Tuesday, April 27, 2010

In April

Marty and I booked a trip to St. Lucia.

It's an all inclusive package which I'm terrified of. My favorite places to go are when I end up in hurricanes/floods, shoot guns with foreign old men, get kidnapped/shot at/chased by drug dealers, go clubbing where I absolutely under no circumstances belong, or go diving for hidden treasures in shipwrecks/pretend I'm The Little Mermaid. I'll tell you about it another time.

There will be no off-property budget for this one, because it's a luxury room at Sandals and we spent all our lifesavings and Marty is certain it's going to be La Bamba. That means The Bomb in Spanish. No, it doesn't. Why do I do that? Sorry.

One time, a couple of friends and I were at a nice restaurant called "Anclas". Being curious, Annie asked, "What does Anclas mean?" As I didn't want to look like a fool, I replied, "Anclas? Oh, that doesn't mean anything. Maybe it's a name or something." To which Tamara, and her neverending wealth of Spanish knowledge, responded, "Anclas means Anchor, idiots." Well, that is a stupid word for anchor.

*********************************************************

Went on a Segway Tour in the Distillery District where I learned that Back In The Day, Al Capone used one of the Distilleries there during The Prohibition, and killed all sorts of people buy shooting them into the wells. And also that the people used to ward off the shoreline by piling dead horses into a giant heap, so that is also something gross.

Some other stories were told too but the guys telling them were so much like Mountain Dew Dudes I couldn't concentrate on anything but their douchebaggery. They were interrupting each other, like, "DUDE! Then what happened?!" but I (and everyone else) knew that they knew what happened and they were just trying to generate excitement. You'll get nothing from me but one raised left eyebrow, Mountain Dew Dude!!

Also, Marty was racing ahead of the gang at 2 mph(like really, that's warp speed on a Segway), carving like he was on a snowboard all cool-like, so I was pretty much laughing at him the entire time.

Segway'ing (?) is SO fun!! It's really just like that movie Paul Blart: Mall Cop. I'm not saying I'm all la-dee-da now, but it was pretty Hollywood.
People thought we were in a gang. A Segway gang.

*********************************************************

Well, apparently my month was really boring. It may not have been, though. My short-term memory lasts about 2 weeks.

*********************************************************

ZOMG!! ZOMG ZOMG ZOMG!!

MAJOR UPDATE!!

I just met this dude on craigslist who sold me, omg omg omg:

Singstar
Singstar POP
Singstar 80's
Singstar 90's

...and two microphones for $30. That's like what the tax is if I paid for these instore!! I cannot WAIT to get all the singin' happening!!

One of my favorite songs of all time is on one: I Wanna Dance With Somebody by Whitney Houston, pre-crack era. This is the song I am generally listening to when you see me walking down the street with an 80's skip in my step, singing quietly to passing trees and doing chest shimmies to fences and dogs. I don't even care who's watching when this song is on.

OoooOHHH I wanna dance with somebahdeyyy
I wanna feel the HEAT with somebahDAYEEHH
OOOoooohh I wanna DANCE with somebahdeyyy
With somebodehh who loves meee!

My favorite part:

Somebody - WHOOOO?!
Somebody - WHOOOO?!

Anyways, that is all.

No comments:

Post a Comment